Loneliness killing.....

It was mock at me; during this first touch of raindrops 2 ground
The whole globe was drenched in its shower except me
I just became a divorcee of my own fate
And it was a bad joke that destiny cracked at me

Being apart and lonely is like an old tree at some corner of the village
A silent witness of the entire storm that tried 2 erase its existence from the map concerned
But still I have to stand for my people who left me aloof
Coz' I still wish if they would ever think of my shadow after a long walk & getting tired

Still I didn't get why I remained alone, where I lost all my moments of joy
When was the beginning of my journey 2wards this loneliness
Where was the mistake that made me so typical & rude enough
So that someday scanning my feelings 2 get a smile will be proved foolishness

My loneliness has become a part of my life since long
That reminds me that I am not completed within myself, not yet
I realized that my loneliness was because of myself only
I have built walls instead of bridges in life, I was such an architect

We are born alone, we live alone, and we die alone
No one dies 4 another coz' every1 lives 4 his own
Though through our love and friendship we can create
The illusion for our moments that we are not alone, but it’s still an illusion

What I realized is that the most terrible poverty is loneliness,
And the feeling of being unloved, unwanted & underestimated
I am praying that my loneliness may help me into finding something to live for
So that I can live my days completely at least till it can be expected

When loneliness kills each smile that tries 2 wave my cheeks
It happens when loneliness becomes the murderer of each desire & 2 me it is happening
I feel all alone in the crowd & I feel dying at each moment though I am alive
Coz loneliness is disturbing me always.......& Loneliness Killing..........

It usually happens 2 me........The unusual things

Sometimes when I think of my lyf... I try 2 realize......
What such a big mistake I did if I did fell in luv.........
Definitely gravitation was not responsible 4 it...but even I am not........
I tried a lot 2 keep myself aloof 4m it but in vain... as usual...

I knew it's a difficult business, 2 luv & decided not 2 ever fell in
But to my great dismay I did fell in unknowingly... I knew that I'm gonna get a lot of pain
But I was completely helpless as I got a spark of luv during those days
I lost my heart I lost my mind, & tried 2 close my eyes & not 2 feel it but in vain... as usual..

I died on that beautiful spark & opted 2 burn throughout the life
Coz' that spark did lighten my world & drove me away 4m darkness those days
I still do enjoy burning coz it was my choice...it was my decision.....which I will never regret on
Since long I am trying 2 let my sorrow go down the drain... But in vain....as usual..

Now I am far away 4m the happiness...& getting too much closer 2 my prescheduled destruction
But now I am scared, I don't wanna die coz death it's gonna steal my lovely memories away 4m me
I am trying 2 live coz’ I wanna tell the world that i didn't do any mistake if I loved
So won't get punished i won't drop the bitter shower of emotional draining..but in vain...as usual..

My golden days were not much longer but were quite high density of memorable moments in it
I never cared for how much r the moments there in my lyf 2 luv & 2 live
Coz I tried 2 live my whole life within a single moment with that brightest spark of my luv
Still I tried 2 run after that brightness 2 snatch it 4m my fate...but in vain as usual

Now I lost again... again I lost... I lost my lyf...I lost my dreams.....
I am a complete bloody looser..... A looser in lyf...as at every relation I failed...
Neither could I be a good son of my parents...nor be a good brother 2 my sisters...
I tried a lot 2 b a gud friend a gud lover in my lyf ...but in vain... as usual...

Hence was my decision that it would b better if I won't look for any further relationship...
In fact it was very difficult 2 maintain every relation... and I am tired of my lyf... a looser lyf...
I still could not get that...why the hell all these unusual things usually happens 2 me... happens 2 me onlyI am afraid of myself & I feel suffocated within my own world..., my days r full of pain & it’s really very very unusual.....

My First Love Letter

My 1st letter of luv.............
Awaking all over the night being so impatient
I am writing my 1st message of my luv 2 my luv...
Yes, it's my 1st luv letter & hence I want
2 pour all my feelings 4 her that in my heart, I do have...

It’s my 1st letter of luv…………
I wanna drench the paper with my desires & my wish
I wanna say all those I could not ever tell her...
Whatever I am writing 2 enclose herewith is too short
As compared to my imagination when I think of her...


My 1st letter of luv.............
My letter is full of our lovely memories & sense of her divine touch
She can feel it as softer than the silk, sweeter than the sweetest honey...
When she will go through she can get, I have written such things 4 her
And hence will realize what’s my destination & 4 what is my journey…

There in my 1st letter of luv………
An arrow shot through a red heart in the midway is there in it
To let her know that it’s her luv I seek... coz' I am sick of her luv…
I mentioned that when I will meet her, I will see u full heartedly
I will tell her what & how much I do think of her & her luv…

In my 1st letter of luv…….....
I am telling her that looking at her my eye lids go down
Though it wants 2 keep looking at her charming eyes ever glittering…
That I could not get control over my emotion & always
I was forgetting that I wanted 2 tell, each time I was forgetting everything…

It’s my 1st letter of luv…………
I wanted u choose her as the only option in my life always
But she never did get a chance 2 opt me though to do she also wanted…
Sometimes shyness, sometimes social barriers & sometimes something else
Always tried 2 drive her away 4m me but in vain.... it never succeeded…

Through my 1st letter of luv………
I want 2 make it clear that I never expected 4m her 2 live & die together with me
I just wanted a promise 2 b there with me 4ever in my heart in my soul & in my vein…
And I’m pretty sure that it will not break...such a promise...
Coz at least I’m gonna ever cherish her & will keep her in my heart, in my brain…


With my 1st letter of luv………
I want 2 remind her our days of funny fightings, our lovely qurrels
The temporary "katti" & the "mitti" after the compromise & my sayings of sorry…
Our small happiness & the most beautiful smile of the world on her face
How can I forget her sweet anger, her innocence & the moments we were making merry…

By my 1st letter of luv………
I tried to make her assure that I’m gonna think of her always & gonna miss her a lot
I am sory 4 the mistakes I did unknowingly & if I did ever hurt…
I am really very happy that i could complete this letter my 1st luv letter up 2 some extent
But still............ something left........ actually there left a lot............a lot …

My 1st letter of luv………
As usual my luv letter also took an attempt 2 be completed with....Ur luv, urs 4evr... Ur Mrunal
But I wish if it could succeed.........it is left incomplete... my luv letter... my luv... my lyf…
I have a successful & beautiful luv story..........though incomplete..........
But still I do expect the unexpected 2 happen in my lyf.... coz' I believe in it...in my luv in my lyf…

In my 1st letter of luv………
I am telling that I had no dream ....but when I met her I had a lot of them in eyes
While going she left a lot of desires unfinished in my lyf... & went away with my heart…
The only thing that will kill me ever is that... my last luv letter remained pending
My message of love is still undelivered...but I promise that I won't ever regret 4 that…

My 1st letter of luv………
My 1st luv letter itself is my last one... my last luv letter......
Others can read .......but only she can understand it better…So it was the end of my dreams.....my destination
Was a mirror on which it reflects, my feelings...coz it is my 1st & last luv letter...

Coz It's My First com. Last Luv Letter
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Click Here 2 See The Video ( Attached with it ) : My 1st Luv Letter...

-----Mrunal-----